If you've been asked to interview at an employer's site, chances are you're going to go water glass to coffee cup across from a recruiter or prospective supervisor or co-worker. It's not uncommon for these visits to entail lunch, dinner, and/or a reception. And, while your behavior at such events isn't likely to make or break your candidacy, you ought to know what to do if your napkin falls to the floor. (Answer: As unobtrusively as possible, as the wait staff for a fresh napkin. Don't retrieve your lost napkin from the floor.)
  
Here are tips, suggestions, and do-this- don't-do-that rules and regulations for dining with a prospective employer.

• Utensil etiquette
  As a rule of thumb, when you face a full battalion of knives, forks, and spoons, work from the outside in. In other words, use the flatware the furthest from the plate first. Exception: The salad fork is usually closest to the plate.
• Used utensils must never touch the surface of the table or the tablecloth because they might make the cloth dirty. Even the clean handles of your fork and knife should not touch the table.
• At the end of a course, place your used utensil on a flat dish. Do not leave a fork or spoon in a bowl or cup (that's why there's usually a flat dish under the soup bowl!) where it might flip and assault your host.

 

 

 

The basics

• If you aren't sure what to order, follow your host's lead. A chicken breast or vegetable plate is always safe. Don't discuss dietary restrictions; downplay your food preferences.
• Don't order foods that require twirling or licking, are apt to splatter or spray, or require you to wear a bib.
• Stick to soft drinks, tea, coffee, and water. Avoid beer, wine, and mixed drinks.
• Cut one bite (meat, fruit, or vegetables) at a time.
• Do not drink from the soup bowl.
• Never make slurping or yummy sounds (even if the food is wonderful and you're very, very hungry).
• Dining is not a race to see who can finish first. Eat at the same pace as your host or hostess.
• Always taste food before you add salt.
• Don't blow your nose in your napkin.
• Don't eat as if this is your last meal. On the other hand, don't dine on half a lettuce leaf. You'll make the best impression by eating like a human-not like a wolf or a bird.

Do:

• Go prepared to be conversational.
• Read national and local newspapers ahead of time so that you can discuss news and events.
• Skim the menu quickly.
• Order a medium-priced entree.
• Sit up straight.
• Relax and keep the conversation focused on business-related or casual topics.
• Say please and thank you to the waiter.

Don't:

• Talk about personal relationships, recent parties, politics, sports, or religion.
• Drink alcohol if you are under age 21; don't have more than one drink if you are 21 or over.
• Get too comfortable. Even if the meal isn't technically an interview situation, you need to be on your toes.

 

 

 

• Between bites, your utensils should rest on the edge of our plate. Your knife rests on the back of your plate; your fork sits on the side of your plate. When you are finished, place your knife and fork so they lie horizontally across the center of the plate. The blade of your knife should face toward you.

Napkin rules
   As soon as you are seated, put your napkin in your lap. Sometimes, at very formal restaurants, the waiter may do this
for you.

Treat your napkin very gently during the meal. Do not crumple it or wad it into a knot. If you use your napkin (and you should), gently dab at your lips. Etiquette books say (we're not making this up),
your napkin should not get dirty in the dining process. It is meant to catch food from falling into your lap (which, of course, it won't) and it should gently dust
the crumbs from your lips. When you are finished, place your napkin next to your plate. Do not refold it. Do not leave it on the chair.

Handling those awkward moments...
  You bite into an olive and discover a pit. Your last bite of fish had a bone in it. You didn't realize just how fatty the meat was. Now, you're not sure you can swallow what's in your mouth.
  No noise and no faces allowed-but you don't have to swallow the inedible. If you need to remove something from your mouth, shift into reverse. Carefully, and with your hand close to your mouth, drop the olive pit into the palm of your hand and put the pit on your plate. Remove the fish bone using two fingers like a pair of tweezers. Set the bone on the edge of your plate. If you think the sight of your chewed meat is going to make your fellow diners gag, bring your napkin to your lips and remove the meat.

A thank you goes a long way
  Write a thank-you note to your host, emphasizing your appreciation for the opportunity to talk about the job (or learn about the organization or meet prospective colleagues) over a meal.

 

Here's a primer on when to use fingers, when to use a fork.

Finger foods

Berries, if served with the stem
Caviar on toast Cheese on crackers Corn on the cob
Crisp bacon
French fries (informal situations only)
Hamburgers
Hors d'oeuvres
Hot dogs
Olives
Onion rings
Pizza
Tacos

Fork foods

Berries without stems
Cake
Clams
Fish
French fries (formal situations)
Fruit
Ice cream served on cake or pie 
Large chicken pieces
Oysters
Pastry
Pizza
Shish kabob
Shrimp
Sushi (or use chopsticks,
  if provided)
Steak

Spoon foods

Berries with sauces
Ice cream
Melon
Peas
Soup

Foods to avoid 

Unfamiliar foods
Spaghetti
Fr~nch onion soup
Buffalo wings
Ribs
Bony fish
Shellfish
Big sandwiches
Cheesy food
Foods requiring special utensils