Anything thing is possible, if you have four hours

I feel I’m late on the uptake coming across Timothy Ferris (of four-hour fame, not the comsmologist), the “world’s best guinea pig”. He’s tried out all sorts of stuff so that you don’t have to. Check out his books on dieting and entrepreneurship. Many of the tips seem counterintuitive, like eating sweet rolls once a week while dieting, but if you’re ready for some fresh ideas you’ll find plenty to consider.

I am thinking of preordering his newest, “The Four-Hour Cook”, which is reported to include information on how to learn anything.

Candy Recycling Service

Talking about my neighbor’s decorations reminded me about something that happened the Halloween before last, that took place on a Friday. My kids had a sleepover, and the next day 5 kids were sitting around the breakfast table and I came up with the idea of going around the neighborhood acting like the Candy Recycling Service, and predicted about a 20% success rate. This was received skeptically but ended up being about right after they got dressed and took a trip around the block knocking on neighbors’ doors–most either had passed out all their candy the night before, or wanted to hold in to what was left, and a few were openly suspicious as to whether the kids actually were with a bona fide Candy Recycling Service. But as predicted, there were a number of households that jumped at the opportunity to dispose of the temptation, one lady cried out “oh yes I do!” when asked if she had any candy she’d like to get rid of. They came back with a whole pillow case full, more than they’d gotten the night before in costume.

As there had been a number of kids exposed to the idea, I predicted that it would quickly go viral as it spread around their school, and then jumped the fence to others, and soon sweep the nation. As far as I can tell this doesn’t seem to have happened yet, I presume since this year Halloween was on a week night, and you can’t really go after work the next day to same effect. I still think this could be a good opportunity to get in on the ground floor of a new micro-business, selling cards for people to out in their windows with the words “No Candy Recycling” so they won’t be bothered by surley teenagers the next day. I thnk it is only a matter of time before this takes off, so I want to register he idea to help future historians figure out where it began n

Neighbor Violates Christmas Decoration Ordinance

This has been a hard year for my neighbor. First he got a ticket from a city inspector for watering on the wrong day of the week. Next he had his industrial strength 4th of July fireworks show shut down by the police. Afterwards he said he was fed up, and was thinking of moving out if town.

Every year since they moved in he has started early getting ready for Halloween. This year he has amped up his Christmas presentation, doubling the number lights in his yard after his dad unloaded a bunch of stuff on him.

I got a lovely idea for a performance art piece: hiring a guy to dress up like a city worker to deliver a citation for being in violation of the city’s excessive Christmas decoration ordinance, having exceeded by 30% or more 50% of the average amount of decorations per residence of his street. It’s a funny idea to me, but I don’t think he would agree, and it could prove to be dangerous for the imposter. My neighbor may be ready to snap, and he has guns.

My neighbor's yard, a week before Christmas

Murphy Was Wrong

You know Murphy’s Law and may enjoy lists of its many corollaries. Basically it’s the idea that “If anything can go wrong it will”, and even more ominously, “If more than one thing can go wrong it will be the worst one”, etc. I haven’t quite worked my response out, but I think I’m far enough along that there may be something to share. Too bad I didn’t put two and two together before Oprah went off the air.

I slip into seeing traces of the truth of Murphy’s Law in situations like being in a hurry and getting stuck at red lights. “It’s always that way. When you’re in a hurry you get red lights, when you have plenty of time you get green.” It hit me a couple of weeks ago that Murphy’s Law may be connected more to the effects of human perception and memory than it is to thermodynamics (“the universe is headed towards disorganization”). You just notice things going wrong more, and remember them better. You don’t remember all the times you were in a hurry and got lucky with green lights, or when you were not in a hurry and hit red lights. Murphy’s Law is a reflection of the way the human brain processes experience.

Maybe if we had a name for the opposite effect it would be easier to grab ahold of and see pleasant patterns. It’s worth a try. How about “Willey’s Law”? “If anything can go right it will, and if more than one thing can go right the best one will.” Then when you’re in a hurry and you hit a green light it won’t just slip by unnoticed, you’ll say “There it goes again—Willey’s Law—when I really needed it something good happened.”

Let yourself be lucky. It’s not something magical, like a shimmering glow you get from being tapped by a fairy’s wand. If you don’t believe it, check out Richard Wiseman’s article (“The Luck Factor”) on a ten-year scientific study into the nature of luck.

Anyway, back to my debunking of Murphy’s Law. If everything that could go wrong, and the worst of all possible ones being most likely, you would never get anything accomplished. You definitely wouldn’t make it to work, what with the accidents that could have happened and all the mechanical problems your vehicle could have developed.

While this may perk you up a little and give you a bit more bounce in your step, I think the most productive application of this awareness could be in your relationship with your partner. We often develop resentments about the way people who are close to us are, seeing patterns and believing that we have figured them out. “You are always doing X.”  It is another result of the sort of perception we have that makes us imagine Murphy’s Law in effect. You just don’t notice all the times that they are doing Y, Z, or J. If you think that someone is a certain way, try remaining especially attentive to times  they are not that way, and be willing to revise your estimation of them. Resentments are often hardened by believing in patterns that may not be there.

The Four Rules of Anything

1. Pay attention
2. Remain calm
3. Accept what has happened
4. Do what needs to be done

Told to me by Jeff George, who doesn’t know where it comes from.

I’m finding lately when something comes up it’s just a matter of finding which of the four rules is most appropriate to apply. If you work through all four and  still find no relief, try closing and locking the door, or running.

How to watch TV, without increasing your risk of developing diabetes

People who log more hours in front of the television are at greater risk of dying, or developing diabetes and heart disease, a new study suggests. “The message is simple,” says study author Dr. Frank Hu. “Cutting back on TV watching is an important way to reduce sedentary behaviors and decrease risk of diabetes and heart disease.”

Here are my two suggestions to address this problem:

1) The combination of TV’s image and sound creates a hypnotic brew that few can resist. My brother turned me on to this—turn the sound down (and perhaps play music of your choice) and just watch the picture. Your brain will have a chance of remaining alert, and you’ll avoid being sucked in, and if you’re paying attention you’ll be delighted by occasional synchronicities between what’s on the screen and what the music’s doing. You don’t have to sit there and stare, it will just become part of the ambience, in the way most people have music on without sitting down and really listening.

2) Watch TV standing up, preferably while doing some sort of movement or stretching instead of eating unhealthy foods. Not only will you be less sedentary, but you’ll get tired and decide, no doubt before you’ve hit the two hour danger mark, to go and do something else.

For more information, visit turnoffyourtv.com

Slow and steady gets the job done.

I’m on the mend from the brink of a frozen shoulder and can’t stretch out my arm, and my friend has a bad knee and can’t bend over. He kindly came over and helped me with installing some shoe molding. We made quite a team, compensating for the other’s limitations. I told him we should start a lite home improvement company called “No Sudden Moves LLC”. Our selling point would be that we would show up on time on the day we scheduled. I think if we did that we’d have more business than we could handle.

11 Things You Won’t Learn in School

OK, this isn’t exactly lovely, but there some of the points have the ring of truth that truely lovely ideas share, even if it’s not true that Bill Gates actually ever gave such a speech.

Bill Gates is reported to have given a speech at a high school about 11 things they did not and will not learn in school.

Rule 1: Life is not fair – get used to it!

Rule 2: The world won’t care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.

Rule 3: You will NOT make $60,000 a year right out of high school. You won’t be a vice president with a car phone until you earn both.

Rule 4: If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss.

Rule 5: Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your grandparents had a different word for burger flipping: they called it opportunity.

Rule 6: If you mess up, it’s not your parents’ fault; so don’t whine about your mistakes, learn from them.

Rule 7: Before you were born, your parents weren’t as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you thought you were. So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent’s generation, try delousing the closet in your own room.

Rule 8: Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life HAS NOT. In some schools, they have abolished failing grades and they’ll give you as MANY TIMES as you want to get the right answer. This doesn’t bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.

Rule 9: Life is not divided into semesters. You don’t get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you “FIND YOURSELF”. Do that on your own time.

Rule 10: Television and video games are NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.

Rule 11: Be nice to nerds. Chances are you’ll end up working for one.

Perfumes: the Guide, by Luca Turin and Tania Sanchez

It’s nice to see people who know a lot about something, and have a flair for telling you about it. Latest example to cross my path: nearly fifteen hundred fragrances reviewed in the definitive book by husband and wife team Luca Turin (scholar in olfactory science) and Tania Sanchez (perfume collector / expert).

The reviews are fun to read, even if you don’t know about perfumes—a nice balance between being informative, poetic, and critical without being overly coy, precious, or snarky. Here are four excerpts from one randomly selected page to wet your atomizer:

“Silly name, silly price. Armani Privé does a cologne, probably the biggest waste of money this side of Le Labo’s Fleur d’Oranger.”

“If you love Eau de Guerlain but want to pay more while getting a harsher, lower-quality fragrance, this one is for you.”

“Wan leafy green. For the fun of putting on perfume without the fun of smelling it.”

“Eau de Noho had a chance to be good with its interesting violet mimosa, like the ghost of Après l’Ondée looking for a witness in a green wilderness. Then a stonking violet leaf arrives to turn everything watery and harsh. Much too close to dishwashing detergent. This needed work.”

Reading a few pages made me feel unsophisticated but cheerful. Next time I’m at the mall I’m going to check out some samples, maybe even visit a specialty store.

Quotes

Jeff G. told me he was enjoying revisiting my quote page. If you like lovely thoughts you will probably find some to your liking there. Don’t miss the responses from 4-8 year olds to the questions “What is love?”